Yesterday I published the first half of the blog Parenting is challenging, this is part two, and I would like to extend that title to add; parenting ‘s hard, but this makes it more difficult.
As I decide on the identity, I would like to assume as a parent these three things were necessary for the vision to come to fruition.
- Values are learnt and not taught
That means the values that I would like my children to learn I have to reflect them myself. For example, I had to show them how to show compassion and empathy by demonstrating that to them and myself.
2. I had to let go of stereotypes.
That includes comparisons that are present in the media, what people say about raising boys or girls. These comments are aplenty.
3. I also had to release cultural expectations and cultural norms to show up different for my children. I remember after having children my father asked very solemnly ‘Jo, raise them the way you were raised’ I said no. I had made a decision to do things a little differently. Ok, so that was the new idealistic parent who felt she knew everything, but since that time I had stuck mostly to my word. There was a lot of what my parents did that was impressive that I decided to emulate.
If you are parenting after childhood difficulties, it will be crucial that you show yourself empathy and be compassionate with you. Be flexible and give yourself permission to ask for help.
The second run of my course Parenting After Childhood Trauma will begin on the 15 August 2017 to be notified when we launch, or for more information, you can sign up here