Wounds To Scars

Tag: Managing Emotions

  • Are You a People Pleaser?

    Are You a People Pleaser?

     

    Many make the mistake of equating Christ-like behaviour with being a people pleaser. Yes. Christ wants us to show His love to others by reaching out to them with kindness, compassion and a willing heart to give them help and support. But this does not mean being a doormat and sacrificing yourself for anyone who wants something. Are you a people pleaser?

     

    “We must not confuse the command to love with the disease to please”

    -Lysa TerKeurst

     

     6 signs that you are a people pleaser:

    1. You cannot say no
      You agree to things you do not want to do. You go out of your way to make sure that you do not break any plans or let anyone down in any way – even if it severely inconveniences you.
    2. You feel like a doormat
      You allow people to take advantage of you in various ways without doing anything about it. You often allow people to hurt you and use you and you just accept it.
    3. You always attract people who need to be ‘rescued’
      People always flock to you because they know you will drop whatever you are doing to help them. This includes family members.
    4. You are constantly apologising
      You find yourself apologising for everything and anything even when you are not in the wrong. Others know that in a sticky situation you will always take the blame. On the flip side of this, you avoid giving yourself credit for anything and feel that everyone else should have credit over you.
    5. You do not ask for or accept help
      You do not ask for help because you don’t want to inconvenience anyone and you want people to believe you can do everything yourself.
    6. You look for praise in othersWhen you complete a task or help someone, you look for praise from others to validate you rather than being satisfied within yourself of your accomplishments.

     

    Consequences of people pleasing

    Real love for others is built on the foundation of honesty. Being dishonest with yourself causes you to neglect your emotional health.

    In turn this leads you to experience the following:

    • Resentfulness to others.
      You will start to become resentful to others because of your inability to say no and because you constantly allow them to treat you badly.
    • Inability to enjoy life
      You still start to find it difficult to enjoy activities and relationships with others because of the way they are treating you.
    • Stressed and Depressed
      Because of the weight of all the commitments you have taken on, that you are unable to stick to, you will become overwhelmingly stressed and if left untreated, fall into a period of depression.

     

    What can you do to overcome your people pleasing habits? Find out in the next blog post…

    Sign up for our online Emotional Healing Conference here!

    Click here to find out how to connect to your loved ones.

  • This One Thing Stops You From Healing

    This One Thing Stops You From Healing

     

    As parents when you do not give yourself permission to deal with your hurt it could make you emotionally unavailable to your children.

    In this video, I will walk you through a simple process that you can use to connect with you and be available to the important people in your life.

  • Negative Feelings!! There is a Way Out

    Negative Feelings!! There is a Way Out

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    The idea of how to manage negative feelings has mystified the minds of many for years and the answer seems to still be eluding people today.  Many people have questions such as; ‘how do I control my emotions?’.  There seems to be a cloud over this topic and the struggle is real and is affecting many.

    I have been asked this question on many occasions, how do I control the emotions that accompany hurtful situations?  What do I do when I am overcome with emotions that I have not been taught how to deal with?  The answer to these questions is not as elusive as we have been conditioned to believe.  In this post, I will begin to help you make sense of that question and give some added help that will enable you to begin a new life unencumbered by negative feelings.

    I will help you apply relevant scriptures to this very important area.  For example, focusing on what is true will help you manage even the most difficult emotions.

    You will learn that fear can hold you back from achieving your full potential.  I will help you examine several truths that are calculated to combat fear.

    1. Are you honest with yourself?
    2. learn how you benefit from negative emotions?
    3. Learn God’s truth about how to make sense of and change where you are.
    4. Learn how to accept God’s truth for you.

      I am sure you do not enjoy negative emotions, I am also sure you do not enjoy the feelings left over after anger, frustration and bitterness have ripped their way through you and coloured an argument or damage a relationship for the hundredth time.  You do not enjoy it but you are also perhaps at the place where you are lost and need direction. The big question maybe how do I change?  I agree there is a problem, but how do I change it.  Watch this video until the end and also watch the others in their series https://www.woundstoscars.com/healing-emotional-wounds-focus-on-truth/

    https://www.woundstoscars.com/honesty-can-heal-emotional-wounds/ https://www.woundstoscars.com/healing-emotional-wounds-five-day-series/

    Throughout the series, you will gain incredible insight into the reasons for negative emotions and learn the steps to overcome.