Sometimes we have difficulty facing the inevitable challenges and disappointments in life. Some internalise this disappointment and function or try to live in a perpetual state of despondency while pretending they are fine. How can we face these trials and overcome? I suggest we be honest with ourselves and God about how we really feel. Join me as I interview one woman who was able to do that and came through on the other side praising.
She shared an enthralling story of faith disappointment and healing.
Interview with Darian Barnaby-Toussant author of ‘A journey of faith disappointment and healing’
Join me as Darian and I talk about recovery after a miscarriage and a very difficult second pregnancy
God’s purposes we cannot see but all is well that’s done by Him.
Joanna: Thank you for taking the time to do this interview, I know it’s very early in the morning for you.
Darien: You are welcome
Joanna: I was very intrigued as I read, your book, it echoes the message that wounds to scars seeks to give. It is a very important message healing is possible but the only person that can do complete healing is God.
Darien: That’s true.
Joanna: I saw was a very honest account of what you went through, an honest account of where you were with God and though you were a church girl and doing all that you were honest in saying ‘I was angry with Him.’ How did you get to the place where you became so honest with God?
Darien: Well we are supposed to talk to Him as we do to a friend so I decided to tell my friend this is how I am feeling. As I would tell my best friend how I am feeling about a situation.
Joanna: You had come to know God as your best friend?
Darien: Oh yes
Joanna: What was that process? How did you come to know God as your best friend?
Darien: When I started out as a Christian I was trying to see who God was. I was trying to learn things about Him. I spent a lot of time with God and as my book suggested, I joined fasting and prayer at church because I believe that some answers will only come through fasting, prayer alone will not do it. I wrote down everything I wanted Him to do for me and I would say ‘Lord these are the things I am asking you to do for me this month’ and as soon as they happen I would tick them off my list. And I would thank Him for answering and through that process of journaling and fasting He became my friend.
Joanna: That sounds like an amazing journey. While in your 20’s you worked out that it is important to have a relationship with God and that relationship carried you through some tough times.
Darien: Yes and shortly after baptism I went to college and I needed to keep that connection with God. They were many times that I could have gotten distracted as I study but I had God as my big brother and that made the difference.
Joanna: Some friendship survives only if there are no disagreements or conflicts or hard conversations. Sometimes people coast through friendships afraid of saying things that might be difficult. But you were not like that with God.
Darien: Not at all, I had to let Him know how I felt, I was upset.
Joanna: You said ‘the following morning after the miscarriage I could not even pray I was vexed with God I had nothing to say to Him’
Darien: That was how I felt. The bible tells us to keep ourselves pure and follow all these principles and I kept all that He asked me to do, I kept my side of the bargain and this was my first pregnancy and I was ecstatic and just like that it went. I definitely believe then that God was unfair. I was around so many people who were having children who did not really want them their pregnancies were progressing and mine had not. That was difficult.
Joanna: What kept you through that? Especially when you believed that God did not keep His side of the bargain.