I am preparing for a speaking engagement this weekend and is trying to manage all the stress that goes with that. Along with getting resources ready, editing booklets and praying about what the Lord wants me to talk about, from experience the Lord always gives me just what the people need for that time in their lives. This time it seems I would personal lessons to share.
As I waited on the Lord, my husband and I decided to fast, as we try to come into agreement regarding what we should pray about, an argument ensued we wanted the same thing, but our approach was different. Then my husband asked the big question DO YOU TRUST ME. Big sigh ‘I am trying’ this was unacceptable to him, but I was honest. As we worked on this new development, I went to pray. And that’s when it happened, I saw the young girl on the hill crying because dad had once again promised something that he did not deliver, it was a familiar feeling. I realised then that he had taught me how not to trust men.
I had a significant light bulb moment, in fact, it felt like being hit by a train. I prayed the prayer of forgiveness and forgave dad for letting me down and forgive myself for holding on to this for so long. Then the other big realisation came if I still struggle with trust what is my confidence status in God. It became apparent that though I speak and write about faith in God, I still had to grow in this area. Then the Lord said ‘talk about trust, tell the people that if they have trust issues in their lives, chances are they will not believe me. Help them to look at this area because I want their heart. I would like to connect with them and fulfill the promise in Jeremiah 30:17’; ‘For I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of the of thy wounds, saith the Lord.’ However, this is not possible without a connection.
I am not opposed to being vulnerable with my audience. However, I objected to sharing this information ‘Lord do I have to use new information?’ He was consistent, I wrote my talk, and am prepared to be obedient. My question for you is, where do you stand? Is there anything impeding your connection, preventing your healing and moving forward. Jesus is the only source of complete healing, if you are struggling with believing Him for your breakthrough ask Him to show you the root of that disbelief and pray, confess and get His help to move forward.
[…] my post lessons from my father, I talked about the effect of being let down. I also discussed how this impacted my ability to […]